Joke of the day. Part 2

[Urumii-Previously ThePresident]

LOL That was really good!!

[Lamron]

That is so true! I couldn't even tell you how many times a Dr. will write a prescription for equipment for a patient without telling them. The first they hear about it is when I show up to deliver it.

[RedRock]

And from the other side, it is frustrating to sit and explain things 3 times to someone and their relatives, including with brochures and diagrams and plain English and the opportunity for them to ask questions and write things down, and when they sign a form saying what's been explained and that they understand and consent, only to have them and their relatives later say "you never told me." And they believe it, too!!!

[YOUR_DADDY]

MARIJUANA FILLED FIREWOOD'

'Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?'
'Yes. What can I do for you?'
'I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith...He's hidin'

Marijuana inside his
firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it inside them logs,
but he's hidin' it there..'
'Thank you very much for the call, sir.'
The next day, twelve Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They
Search the shed where the firewood is kept.
Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana.
They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house.

'Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd....Did the Sheriff come by?'
Yeah !

'Did they chop your firewood?'
'Yep!'
'Happy Birthday, buddy!'
Rednecks know how to git-R-dun

[Lamron]

Aug 15, 2008 13:16:49 GMT -5 RedRock said:

And from the other side, it is frustrating to sit and explain things 3 times to someone and their relatives, including with brochures and diagrams and plain English and the opportunity for them to ask questions and write things down, and when they sign a form saying what's been explained and that they understand and consent, only to have them and their relatives later say "you never told me." And they believe it, too!!!

I've been on that side too! Sometimes a patient will call to complain that the guy who delivered the oxygen equipment just walked into the house, dumped everything on the floor and walked back out again without saying a single word. Then I'll say, "Ma'am, that was me, and I spent 45 minutes with you showing you how everything works, and you signed all the paperwork stating that you understood everything, and that was only three hours ago." And she'll say, "Couldn't have been, nobody's been here at all today."

I deserve a medal for all the times that I didn't tie a knot in someone's oxygen tube.

[vinsanity]

heehee

[Death's Shadow]

ohhh lord do I know how that is Red and Lam.

Nothing like delivering a requested pain med to a lil old lady at 2am. Then the next day the DON chewing my but for refusing to give out pain meds when requested because the lady forgot she received it. Then making the DON eat crow because she was to stupid to check the med record, count the pills, and look at the charting where I wrote down what time, and why the person wanted the pain med and how well it worked. LMAO


And had same problems as you guys with the families even after they sign off saying they understand everything.

[Lost_Child]

The Story of Change . .
Years ago, there was an old tale in the Submarine Force about a lieutenant
who inspected his Sailors and told the Chief Of the Boat that they smelled bad. The
lieutenant suggested that they change their underwear. The Chief responded,
'Aye,aye, sir, I'll see to it immediately'.

He went into the barracks and said, 'The lieutenant thinks you guys smell
bad, and wants you to change your underwear. Smith, you change with
Jones, McCarthy, you change with Witkowskie, Brown, you change with
Schultz. Get to it'.

The moral:

A candidate may promise change in Washington,
but don't count on things smelling any better.

[a Silly Person]

Aug 15, 2008 18:46:09 GMT -5 Lamron said:

that was me, and I spent 45 minutes with you showing you how everything works, and you signed all the paperwork stating that you understood everything, and that was only three hours ago." And she'll say, "Couldn't have been, nobody's been here at all today.

I deserve a medal for all the times that I didn't tie a knot in someone's oxygen tube.

"Senior moments" will be catching up to all of us soon enough. ;D

[RedRock]

Harrumph! The senor moments have already caught up to us!
(that's senor, as in, Si Senor)

[popeye]

Australian ventriloquist.

An Australian ventriloquist visiting New Zealand, walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.

He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Kiwi ...

'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'

Kiwi: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'

Dog: 'Doin' all right.'

Kiwi: (look of extreme shock)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the villager)

Dog: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Dog: 'Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

Kiwi: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

Kiwi: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either.... I think.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

Horse: 'Cool'

Kiwi: (absolutely dumbfounded)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (pointing at the villager)

Horse: 'Yep'

Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking.
He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements.'

Kiwi: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

Kiwi: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a liar.'

[Death's Shadow]

lmao

[a Silly Person]

LMAO

[vinsanity]

LOL!

[BAT*21{usa}]

DOG FOR SALE !!!! Even if you don't own a dog at present, you'll appreciate the efforts of this owner to sell her dog. Read the sales pitch!!!


Dog for sale!

Dog For Sale
* Free to good h ome.
* Excellent guard dog.
* Owner cannot afford to feed him anymore, as there are no more thieves, murderers or molesters left in the neighborhood for him to eat.
* Most of them knew him as 'Holy @&*!'.