Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184 
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Post by Death's Shadow on Sept 26, 2007 12:41:45 GMT -5
LOL IDA sounds about my luck some days. Minus the DUI.
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A_ROOKIE
New Member
When the pain of where you are becomes greater then the fear of where your going, you'll move.
Posts: 716
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Post by A_ROOKIE on Sept 26, 2007 21:33:09 GMT -5
A guy stuck his head into The Village Barbershop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About 2 hours."
The guy left.
A few days later, the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around at the shop and said, "About 3 hours."
The guy left.
A week later, the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?"
The barber looked around the shop and said, "About an hour and a half."
The guy left.
The barber turned to his friend and said, "Hey, Bob, do me a favor. Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how
long he has to wait for a haircut, but then he doesn't ever come back."
A little while later, Bob returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, "So, where does that guy go when he leaves?"
Bob looked up, wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes, and said, "Your house!"
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Post by I...Died...Again!!! on Sept 28, 2007 5:18:48 GMT -5
I was in WalMart buying a large bag of Purina for my dog, and was in line to check out. The woman behind me asked if I had a dog...... Duh!! I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her NO. I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital the last time, but that I'd lost 50 lbs. before I'd awakened in the intensive care unit with tubes coming out most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. Her eyes bugged out of her head. I went on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it. I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two everytime you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was now enthralled with my story, ; particularly the tall guy behind her. Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was that why I ended up in the hospital. I said no.... I'd been sitting in the middle of the street licking my ass when a car hit me.
I thought the tall guy behind her was going to have to be carried out....
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Sept 28, 2007 7:29:13 GMT -5
LMAO
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Post by WidowMaker on Sept 28, 2007 21:04:05 GMT -5
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Herr_Monk
New Member
"all hells accomin"
Posts: 159
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Post by Herr_Monk on Oct 2, 2007 15:02:25 GMT -5
if i can get on the game the daffy ducks had it.  |
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RedRock
LPmember
Never ask what kind of computer a person uses--if it's a Mac, he'll say; if not, why embarrass him?
Posts: 4,972
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Post by RedRock on Oct 2, 2007 22:01:57 GMT -5
Too bad there are GFCI's now, huh?
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Post by daffy_duck on Oct 3, 2007 12:56:50 GMT -5
but the smile will still be there.
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Oct 3, 2007 15:09:07 GMT -5
OK dont know this one .. fill me in.. what is GFCI?
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Post by Sgt_Blueberry on Oct 3, 2007 18:35:17 GMT -5
Yeah......what is GFCI??? Girl Friend.....C.....I..somthin...  Government....Forced....ummmm C.....I sort of ?? Green Fried Cactus Italiano ? Just kidden......really Red, what does this acronym mean? |
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Lamron
Benevolent Dictator
Posts: 5,225
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Post by Lamron on Oct 3, 2007 19:19:50 GMT -5
Look closer Red, there's no GFCI. He's connected directly to house current.
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Marauder(CDN)
New Member
One who plunders; especially, a pirate; a corsair; a marauder; a sharper
Posts: 1,047
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Post by Marauder(CDN) on Oct 3, 2007 19:27:12 GMT -5
Ground Fault Circuit Interrupt....if it detects a short it has a built in breaker that immediately trips
here's a definition that I found
How the GFCI Works
In the home's wiring system, the GFCI constantly monitors electricity flowing in a circuit, to sense any loss of current. If the current flowing through the circuit differs by a small amount from that returning, the GFCI quickly switches off power to that circuit. The GFCI interrupts power faster than a blink of an eye to prevent a lethal dose of electricity. You may receive a painful shock, but you should not be electrocuted or receive a serious shock injury.
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Oct 3, 2007 19:35:55 GMT -5
aaaa thanks for the definition there Mar... now I know what he ment..
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a Silly Person
New Member
Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
Posts: 1,370
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Post by a Silly Person on Oct 3, 2007 22:22:08 GMT -5
Ron was in trouble.
He forgot his wedding anniversary and his wife was really angry.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 6 seconds, AND IT BETTER BE THERE!!"
The next morning Ron got up early and left for work.
When his wife woke up she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house.
She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Ron has been missing since Friday.
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RedRock
LPmember
Never ask what kind of computer a person uses--if it's a Mac, he'll say; if not, why embarrass him?
Posts: 4,972
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Post by RedRock on Oct 3, 2007 23:37:38 GMT -5
Look closer Red, there's no GFCI. He's connected directly to house current. You can buy devices with a GFCI built-in (intended for troublesome devices in homes with no built-in GFCI's), or it can be part of the home's wiring itself (is my understanding). So, pitching an operating electrical device into a tub with an operative GFCI, either on the device or in the home wiring, means no biggie! Thanks for the backup, Mar. |
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