Save Gasoline (and end illegal immigration)

[Lost_Child]

George Carlin's Solution to Save Gasoline (and end illegal immigration)


Bush wants us to cut the amount of gas we use.....

The best way to stop using so much gas is to deport 11 million illegal immigrants!


That would be 11 million less people using our gas. The price of gas would come down.....


Bring our troops home from Iraq to guard the Border....


When they catch an illegal immigrant crossing the border, hand him a canteen, rifle and some ammo and ship him to Iraq ...

Tell him if he wants to come to America then he must serve a tour in the military....
Give him a soldier's pay while he's there and tax him on it.....


After his tour, he will be allowed to become a citizen since he defended this country.....
He will also be registered to be taxed and be a legal patriot..... .


This option will probably deter illegal immigration and provide a solution for the troops in Iraq and the aliens trying to make a better life for themselves.. ....


If they refuse to serve, ship them to Iraq anyway, without the canteen, rifle or ammo.....
Problem solved.....

[Lamron]

Snopes.com is your friend! www.snopes.com/politics/soapbox/carlingas.asp

We could use the border for military training though. Target practice for riflemen on moving targets as Mexicans walk across the border, and some of those cool long-range artiliery pieces can be sighted in on the vans. We'll save the expensive airstrikes for the Mexican army humvees that keep coming across to protect drug smuglers.

[Lost_Child]

OOPS





I liked the Idea anyway !

[a Silly Person]

I was going to post that one too, but take George Carlin's name off of the intro.

I liked the sound of it too but since I have been visiting Snopes quite often lately for emails and such, I would have guessed it was fake.

My Dad just called me asking if I checked out that "Cell Phone" email yet. The one about being able to unlock your vehicle over a cell phone connection. He checked that one out and nope, it's not true .


Here is one I checked out on www.ireallycheckedthisoutonsnopes.com and it happens to be true ;D

George and Laura Bush and Bill and Hillary Clinton are traveling by train to the Super Bowl. At the station George and Laura each buy a ticket and watch as Bill and Hillary buy just one ticket.

"How are the two of you going to travel on only one ticket?" asks George W, astonished at what he is seeing. "Watch and learn," answers Hillary.

They all board the train. George and Laura take their respective seats, but Bill and Hillary cram into a toilet together and close the door.
Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the toilet door and says, "Ticket, please." The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The Bushes see this happen! and agree it was quite a clever idea, so after the game they decide to try a similar plan on the return trip. When they get to the station they see the Clinton 'S at the window buying a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the Clinton 's see that the Bushes don't buy any ticket at all.

"Aren't you taking a terrible chance by traveling without a ticket?" says Hillary.

"Watch and learn," answers Laura Bush. When they board the train the Bushes cram themselves into a toilet and the Clinton 'S cram into another toilet just down the way.

Shortly after the train leaves the station, George W. leaves their toilet and walks over to the Clinton's toilet, knocks on their door and says, "Ticket, please."

[RedRock]

Funny! Unexpected punch line!