a Silly Person
New Member
Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
Posts: 1,370
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Post by a Silly Person on Mar 9, 2008 10:21:22 GMT -5
Here is a simple "Who's your Best Friend" experiment anyone can do at home.
Put your dog and your Wife in the trunk of your car for an hour.
When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you?
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Mar 9, 2008 10:24:45 GMT -5
LMAO... Yep you like to take your own life into your hands Silly...
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Killer_Monkey
New Member
Even a creepy little undead Monkey can kill!!
Posts: 199
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Post by Killer_Monkey on Mar 9, 2008 11:35:40 GMT -5
wow sills, thats a good one. about the peanuts that's a little gross. and the other one just goes to show you that men do not listen when they are supposed to. LOL
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Post by Lost_Child on Mar 9, 2008 12:27:17 GMT -5
Here is a simple "Who's your Best Friend" experiment anyone can do at home. Put your dog and your Wife in the trunk of your car for an hour. When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you? There's NO WAY I would submit my DOG to that ! ;D
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Post by YOUR_DADDY on Mar 9, 2008 17:55:48 GMT -5
Best friend
A man was feeling very depressed and walked into a bar and ordered a triple scotch. As the bartender poured him the drink he remarked, "That's quite a heavy drink. What's wrong?" After quickly downing his drink, the man replied "I got home and found my wife in bed with my best friend." "Wow" exclaimed the bartender, as he poured the man a second triple, "No wonder you needed a stiff drink. The second triple is on the house." As the man downed his second triple scotch, the bartender asked him "What did you do?" "I walked over to my wife" the man replied, "looked her straight in the eye and told her that we were through and to pack her stuff and to get the hell out." "That makes sense" said the bartender, "but what about your best friend?" The man replied, "I walked over to him, looked him right in the eye and said 'bad dog!'"
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Mar 9, 2008 19:04:34 GMT -5
LMAO that was classic.
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a Silly Person
New Member
Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
Posts: 1,370
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Post by a Silly Person on Mar 10, 2008 2:43:26 GMT -5
LOL
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Killer_Monkey
New Member
Even a creepy little undead Monkey can kill!!
Posts: 199
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Post by Killer_Monkey on Mar 10, 2008 11:54:55 GMT -5
NO COMMENT!! that is gross....LOL
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Mar 10, 2008 15:38:23 GMT -5
But funny
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Post by Lost_Child on Mar 10, 2008 19:44:54 GMT -5
An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all over the road. A cop pulls him over. " So," says the cop to the driver, where have ya been?" " Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk. " Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a few to drink this evening." "I did all right," the drunk says with a smile. " Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms across his chest, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?" " Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. " For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
*****************************************************************
Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan arrives at her door. "Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya". " Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?" " That's what I'm here to be telling ya, Brenda." There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..." " Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me." " I must, Brenda. Your husband Shamus is dead and gone. I'm so! rry. Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?" " It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned." " Oh my dear Jesus! But you must tell me truth, Tim. Did he at least go quickly?" "Well, Brenda... no. In fact, he got out three times to pee."
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Post by YOUR_DADDY on Mar 10, 2008 19:54:47 GMT -5
OMG LC That was funny
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Post by YOUR_DADDY on Mar 10, 2008 19:57:26 GMT -5
A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, "I almost had an affair with another woman."
The priest said, "What do you mean, almost?"
The Irishman said, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped."
The priest said, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to see that woman again For your penance, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box."
The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, "I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!"
The Irishman replied, "Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that's the same as putting it in!"
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Post by beer on Mar 10, 2008 22:39:39 GMT -5
LMAO ;D
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Mar 10, 2008 23:02:00 GMT -5
LMAO ... good ones
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Post by vinsanity on Mar 11, 2008 2:06:03 GMT -5
ROFL!!!!
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