Lamron
Benevolent Dictator
Posts: 5,225
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Post by Lamron on Jun 23, 2008 18:37:35 GMT -5
Time to start a new thread. I've read that EXTREMELY long threads can cause forum problems, so the old Joke of the day thread is locked and we'll start fresh here!
;D ;D ;D
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Post by Sgt_Blueberry on Jun 23, 2008 19:14:58 GMT -5
HAHAAAA....that is too funny Lam....you kill me...
geez...I thought is was humorous, LOL
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Post by Lost_Child on Jun 24, 2008 19:41:48 GMT -5
I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.' I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.' Eric grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?' 'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.' So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T I used to like Eric.............
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Post by YOUR_DADDY on Jun 24, 2008 20:11:23 GMT -5
ROFLMAO,,,,,now that was funny
even wifezilla laughed on that one and she is a computer tec.
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Post by YOUR_DADDY on Jun 24, 2008 20:12:52 GMT -5
Morris and his wife Ester went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Ester, I'd like to ride in that helicopter.
'Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars'
One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.'
To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.'
The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say a word, I won't charge you! But if you say one word, it's fifty dollars.'
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fan cy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word.
When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!'
Morris replied, 'Well to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Ester fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars!'
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Post by Lost_Child on Jun 24, 2008 20:43:45 GMT -5
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a Silly Person
New Member
Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
Posts: 1,370
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Post by a Silly Person on Jun 24, 2008 22:40:37 GMT -5
LMAO!
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RedRock
LPmember
Never ask what kind of computer a person uses--if it's a Mac, he'll say; if not, why embarrass him?
Posts: 4,972
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Post by RedRock on Jun 25, 2008 12:28:13 GMT -5
I was having trouble with my computer. ..... ID ten T error ............ Yeah, I like that one. The similar one I like is PEBCAK error. Problem Exists Between Chair and Keyboard
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Post by Lost_Child on Jun 25, 2008 18:44:59 GMT -5
A mechanic was removing a cylinder-head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known cardiologist in his shop. The cardiologist was there waiting for the service manager to come take a look at his bike when the mechanic shouted across the garage, 'Hey Doc, want to take a look at this?' The cardiologist , a bit surprised, walked over to where the mechanic was working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, 'So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take the valves out, repair any damage, and then put them back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I make $39,675 a year and you get the really big bucks ($1,695,759) when you and I are doing basically the same work?'
The cardiologist paused, smiled and leaned over, then whispered to the mechanic... 'Try doing it with the engine running.
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Post by Sgt_Blueberry on Jun 25, 2008 19:46:50 GMT -5
Nice LC
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Post by Sgt_Blueberry on Jun 27, 2008 11:10:26 GMT -5
An older, very dignified gentleman went to his travel agent and tried to book a two-week cruise for himself and his lady friend. The travel agent said that all the ships were booked up and reservations were very tight at that moment, but that he would see what he could do.
A couple of days later, the travel agent phoned and said he could get them onto a three-day cruise. The gentleman was disappointed that it was such a short cruise, but booked it, and then went to the drugstore to buy three Dramamines and three condoms.
The next day, the agent called back and reported that he now could upgrade him to a five-day cruise. The gentleman said, "Great, I'll take it!" And he returned to the same pharmacy to buy two more Dramamines and two more condoms.
The following day, the travel agent called yet again, and said he was delighted that he could offer them bookings on an eight-day cruise. The gentleman was elated and went back to the drugstore. He asked for three more Dramamine and three more condoms.
The pharmacist looked sympathetically at him and said, "Look, I'm not trying to pry, but if it makes you sick, why do you keep doing it?"
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RedRock
LPmember
Never ask what kind of computer a person uses--if it's a Mac, he'll say; if not, why embarrass him?
Posts: 4,972
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Post by RedRock on Jun 27, 2008 11:40:18 GMT -5
lol, bb, THAT WAS FUNNY. I got "dizzy" reading it, in fact!
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Jun 27, 2008 17:52:21 GMT -5
lmao
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Post by Lost_Child on Jul 3, 2008 16:29:42 GMT -5
Two Crocodiles were sitting at the side of the swamp near the lake.
The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, "I can't understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age; we were the same size as kids. I just don't get it."
"Well," said the big Croc, "what have you been eating?"
"Politicians, same as you," replied the small Croc.
"Hmm. Well, where do you catch them?"
"Down the other side of the swamp near the parking lot by the Capitol."
"Same here. Hmm. How do you catch them?"
"Well, I crawl up under one of their Lexus cars and wait for one to unlock the car door. Then I jump out, grab them by the leg, shake the crap out of them and eat 'em!"
"Ah!" says the big Crocodile, "I think I see your problem. You're not getting any real nourishment. See, by the time you finish shaking the crap out of a Politician, there's nothing left but an a$$hole and a briefcase
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Death's Shadow
LPmember
I have become Death. The destroyer of worlds.
Posts: 3,184
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Post by Death's Shadow on Jul 3, 2008 16:55:42 GMT -5
LMAO Very good one.
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