Joke of the day. Part 2

[RedRock]

Sigh, if only we all lived closer together.

[Lamron]

Move to Indianapolis! Improve your ping! Play with my stuff!

[popeye]

I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend



and I had been dating for over a year, and so we



decided to get married. There was only one



little thing bothering me...It was her beautiful



younger sister.





My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very



tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She



would regularly bend down when she was near



me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to



be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was



near anyone else.





One day her 'little' sister called and asked me to



come over to check the wedding invitations. She was



alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she



had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't



overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once



before I got married and committed my life to her sister.



Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word.



She said, 'I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if



you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me.'





I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go



up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned



and made a beeline straight to the front door. I



opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.



Lord... and behold, my entire future family was standing



outside, all clapping!





With tears in his eyes, my father-in-law hugged me and



said, 'We are very happy that you have passed our



little test. We couldn't ask for a better



man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.'



And the moral of this story is:



Always keep your condoms in your car.

[Death's Shadow]

lol

[Urumii-Previously ThePresident]

Why Parents Drink:

The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees was absent one day, but had not phoned in sick. Needing to have an urgent problem with one of the main computers resolved, he dialed the employee's home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.
' Hello ? '

'Is your daddy home?' he asked.


' Yes ,' whispered the small voice.


May I talk with him?'

The child whispered, ' No .
'

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, 'Is your Mommy there?' ' Yes '

'May I talk with her?' Again the small voice whispered, ' No '

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, 'Is anybody else there?'

' Yes ,' whispered the child, '&n bsp; a policeman.
'

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home, the boss asked, 'May I speak with the policeman?'

' No, he's busy , ' whispered the child.


'Busy doing what?'

' Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman, ' came the whispered answer.


Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, 'What is that noise?'

' A helicopter ' answered the whispering voice.


'What is going on there?' demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.
Again, whispering, the child answered,

' The search team just landed a helicopter '

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, 'What are they searching for?'

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle...
" ME "

[Major_A]

lol





The Department of Defense briefed the President this morning and told OBAMA that

two Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq . To everyone's surprise, all the color drained

from Obama's face. Then he collapsed onto his desk, head in his hands, visibly shaken,

almost in tears.

Finally, he composed himself and asked, "Just how many is a brazilian?"

This is especially enlightening since he obviously has no understanding of billion or

trillion either.

[Urumii-Previously ThePresident]

Lol!!

[Death's Shadow]

LMAO


Good one. ;D